Five Things My Mom Never Said To Me In High School

1) I really like those combat boots with that dress.

2) What’s the band called? The Meat Puppets? Sure, here are the car keys.

3) School, schmool. Let’s go see a Molly Ringwald movie.

4) You have exceptional taste in boyfriends. Any one of them will make you blissfully happy for the rest of your life.

5) They were out of Benson and Hedges, Camels okay?