Professionally I’m a writer, social media consultant, TV producer and mom blogger. You can check out my PORTFOLIO for samples of my work.
I’m recently married (formerly answered to Suzanne Broughton) and I live in Orange County, Ca. with my husband, two kids and two step kids. We are just like the Brady Bunch but we don’t have an Alice … or six kids … or a butcher named Sam … or a station wagon … or an antique lamp in our den … or a den. We like to call ourselves the Broshenkos.
Just for the sake of time, we’re all busy, here are 30 random things about me:
1. My friends call me Suz.
2. One of my proudest professional moments was having a list published on McSweeney’s: Easy listening songs from the ’70s rewritten by the artists after they had kids. But, I think this is the funniest thing I’ve ever write, FYI iPhones don’t float.
3. I have an irrational, but not completely unfounded, fear of vans. White unmarked vans are particularly worrisome. There should be a law …
4. Every time I watch the 2007 Anaheim Ducks win the Stanley Cup I cry like most girls cry at the end of the movie “Beaches.”
5. I am tragically and disgracefully forgetful. Thankfully my friends and family have decided to embrace this truth as cute and quirky and always send a calendar reminder when they make plans with me and I’ve taken to paying my kids to find misplaced items. The going rate for my reading glasses is $1.
6. I attended charm school at Montgomery Wards in Huntington Beach when I was a young girl. I can still walk, sit down and cross my legs with a book perched on my head. (Which has proven to be largely useless in my adult life.)
7. My 2015 New Year’s resolution this year is “Give twice. Take once.” Let’s hope I keep it better than last year’s resolution, which I forgot. (See #5.)
8. I am an amateur photographer.
9. I have my own reserve of Snail Jokes that I can tell whenever asked – which honestly, I am NEVER asked.
10. I’d rather eat a bowl of bees than a bowl of peas.
11. I can’t stop myself from smiling when in an uncomfortable or overly serious situation. Which has lead to some pretty heated conversations which usually include phrases like, “Is this all a big joke to you?” or with accusations of “giving mixed messages.”
12. I am an excellent parallel parker and have an uncanny knack of guessing what time it is any time of the day or night.
13. My kids and stepkids insist on never letting me lift a finger around the house and do all the chores, cooking and cleaning.
14. I like to tell lavish and utterly untrue stories, give them a minute to settle and then say “Only joking, of course.” (See #13.)
15. I’m addicted to Lip Smackers, still like to wear Love’s Baby Soft, and I like to roller skate to Earth, Wind and Fire.
16. I worked at Ruby’s while going to college. I loved being a Ruby’s waitress because it incorporated three of my favorite things: 1) being bossy 2) red lipstick, and 3) chatting with strangers.
17. I’m slightly obsessed with Mr. Darcy and wouldn’t pick up “50 Shades of Grey” to read if it were the only book on a non-stop train from California to New York.
18. I broke up with my 11th-grade boyfriend once I saw him in his Farrell’s uniform. A straw hat, in my opinion, is a crush killer.
19. I’m the receiver of some pretty amazing grace.
20. Mary Tyler Moore was my idol growing up.
21. If you told me I could never eat chocolate again, that would be fine with me. If you told me that I can never eat French fries again, well, then Sir, we would have a problem.
22. My son is named after my stepdad. My daughter is named after two of the three Bronte sisters.
23. I have a theory that biscotti is a mafia-backed baked good because I haven’t ever met anyone who likes them, yet they are everywhere.
24. I am 100% Mac. My husband is PC. We make it work.
25. Small Elizabethan shoes, tuna melts and clowns creep me out…oh, and that Twilight Zone with William Shatner when he sees the monster on the wing of the plane.
26. You can email me at firstname.lastname@example.org I’d love that.
27. When I was nine-years-old my older brothers hung my Holly Hobbie doll from a noose from the ceiling light in my room. I let out a scream of pure terror when I saw it. If I think about it I can still see her hanging there. Besides that, my brothers were pretty kind to me.
28. I firmly believe I coined the word “tangenting.” Which is really just a clever way of masking my undiagnosed adult onset ADD.
29. When I lived in San Francisco I snagged a job at a VERY fancy restaurant in Pacific Heights. It was great! The only problem was, when I had to open a nice bottle of wine at the table I couldn’t do it! I’d choke every time — leaving the cork mangled and shards of aluminum like sheet metal on the bottle. Finally and rightfully, I was fired because of it. Still, to this day, I still have a mild anxiety attack every time I see a bottle of wine. But I still try to be “BIGGER THAN MY FEAR” and order wine every time I go to a restaurant. Life is a journey.
30. I can be a tad self-involved sometimes.